- In my house, every spare inch counts. This means gum wrappers, beer bottles, and socks have no business being left in my living room. My house is only 946 square feet (not including the mancave which, for obvious reasons, does not count as part of my house). This, according to my calculations, is roughly the size of my sister's closet. This is why I need a new house.
- We know that my old house (which is my current house, but according to The Secret, I must now refer to it as my old house since I have to believe I live in a new one) is too small. We know this because after a full day of football, my entire house smells like wet dog. It is unknown whehter this cause of this smell is the dogs we were watching this weekend or Neb's friends. I'll blame his friends, obviously, because that's how I roll (read: I'm a giant bitch).
- Does the flavor saver make any one else want to hurl? I mean, really. Who thought that a random spare patch of hair under the lower lip would be attractive to anyone? Shave it off, already.
- Today I planned my outfit based on the fact that I didn't want to do my hair. The end result is that I look exactly like a gypsy. On the plus side, I won't have to shop for a Halloween costume and can instead start saving my money for a pot-bellied pig. Or a monkey. I haven't yet decided.
- The Neighbors have a new baby at their house and I am obsessed with him. I was plotting to steal him, but then I remembered that a side effect of having a baby is responsibility, so I bought a new jacket instead.
The end.
2 comments:
I usually plan my outfits on whether or not I feel like doing my hair. The end result is usually jeans and a t-shirt with a wavy mess on top. Because I am lazy.
Gray must have chin hair AT ALL TIMES. Beard, goat, whatever. His chin is inverted. Without the flavor saver? He looks like a Simpson.
Post a Comment