Grateful (Sister, Part 2)

So my daily teaching yesterday taught me that it is not enough to just envision what you want, but that you must also be grateful for what you have.

I kind of brushed this off, because I was too busy to find something to be grateful for. Seriously. Lately, my job has been such that I felt like I was cheating because I left work by 4PM yesterday, even though I got there at 6AM.

Anyway.


I went to a Pilates fusion class with Sopko, and, despite the fact that the instructor talked in a creepy Nadya Suleman-esque voice the entire time and looked exactly like my boss, I had a grand time, was able to relax, and began to name the things I am grateful for.

As I was sitting there in some pose called the Screaming Pigeon (no fucking kidding!), even though I felt like kicking the instructor in the face, my thoughts inevitably turned to my sister and the fact that she'd probably kill to be able to hold that pose.

I was inspired to hold it longer.

I thought about the fact that I sometimes get depressed because I hate my thighs. She gets depressed because of pain in her body from doing such things as cleaning. Or walking.

She was always an inspiration to me growing up. She was outgoing and pretty, I was shy and nerdy. I would tag along with her and her friends in high school and regularly visited her while she was away at college. I would watch her dance during college football and basketball games and date endless boys, always wishing I could be more like her.

She is an inspiration to me now. I complain about my long days, but she works even more than I do, plus she has 2 kids. Oh, and her crazy ass gets up at 4:30am to work out. But she does this all with chronic pain in her body, having to use a cane some days, and deemed by the state of Washington to be worthy of a Disabled parking pass.

Bitch is still skinnier than I am, though....

Everything is relative.

I am grateful for my health, just as I am grateful for hers.

Which should completely stop me from ever complaining that my thighs are too big or that I'm too tired to work out.

But probably won't because sometimes you just forget to be grateful.

Because even though no one ever said life would be fair, sometimes you just think it should be anyway.